Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
