i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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