The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
