Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize