You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
