Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
