Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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