Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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