I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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