Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
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