Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
