She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
My penis needs a shock collar
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
