Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Come see our sink grown plant.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
foreskin is a definite game changer
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
