someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
