Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Randomize