Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
