what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
