doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
im holly from the hills drunk
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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