These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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