Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize