I want to stick my p in your. b.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize
