hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
