let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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