My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
