How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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