omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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