I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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