There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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