Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
