You just made me feel so damn special
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Randomize
