He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
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