I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
My dick has a subreddit
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
