i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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