We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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