You're so nebulous sometimes
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
