Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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