Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
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