I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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