The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Randomize
