i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
