Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
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