RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Randomize
