If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
