Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
