New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I didn't notice because vodka
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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