oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
