Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
