So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
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