I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
My feet surprised me
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