It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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